[5 Days To Go] The Free Press Has No Mustache

It's been stated earlier. But, it needs to be stated again.

Those with mustaches are for us. Those without are against us. The Free Press has no mustache.

THE FREE PRESS HAS NO MUSTACHE.Michael Rosenberg has no Mustache.

Also, multiple sources with the Detroit Free Press have stated that Michael Rosenberg hates puppies--absolutely LOATHES them, in fact. Said sources may or may not currently work at the Free Press. ESPN's Joe Schad to confirm shortly.