Thursday, August 12, 2010

[23 Days to Go] The Ladies, The 'Stache, The Hazards of Love.

Old Spice Commercial Guy knows what's up: Your lady wants you to grow a mustache.

Now, she might claim otherwise but she knows deep down that there's some crazy attraction going on with the 'stache. For you, Mustaches for Michigan Member, this is a happy by-product. You get to guide your team to victory through the cosmic powers of your mustache AND your lady cannot resist you? Score, brother. Your mustache cancels out her headaches. This is what we like to call a Win-Win. Remember Newton's Law of Moustaches? Lemme remind you:
Mustache = Win.
Well when it comes to the opposite sex, this too holds true. But don't take our word for it.  Take Old Spice Commercial Guy's. Although, we can't speak to the body wash he endorses.

NOTE: If you do not already have a special ladyfriend who has come to find you generally repulsive and withholds sex, reorganizes your living space so that you can never find anything, and makes plans for you which she will tell you about the night of, then worry not, Young Mustachio'er. When you go out looking for the ladies rocking a mustache, you will easily find a young mistress who will gladly ask you to take out the garbage while telling you to never again wear your favorite shirt because of the armpit stains. But know this: Using a mustache to attract a mate requires that you be a gentleman at all times: you will be respectful and responsible. Go forth and be conquered. 

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